Processing Paris, Refugees, Fear, Neighbors, Terrorism and Tired Huddled Masses

When scary, horrible things happen, everything in us wants to react in some way. We feel out of control. We don't understand why. And it is a horrible feeling, so we as humans have a tendency to make hasty conclusions and decisions in our attempt to avoid feeling the pain of reality. Unfortunately, those judgments and decisions are not always in our or anyone’s best interests. I dusted off this dormant blog and offer these reflections as part of my own processing in hopes that they might help others process these recent events as well.

Along with most of my countrymen and women and many people in other nations, I am still reeling in shock about the killings in Paris. Yes, I am well aware of the horrendous bombing in Lebanon - I was saddened about that. The mosque bombings in Iraq, the ongoing Boko Haram violence in Nigeria, oh, and the many others that don't even make the first row of headlines on my news app. So first, I want to address this meme I am seeing as people process and jump to conclusions. I will be honest, even though I am a global citizen, have lived over 10 years outside the USA, and have friends in over 40 countries, yes, the Paris killings hit me emotionally more than some of the other recent tragedies. I expect that's true for many (certainly not all) of my countrymen and women. Does that make us shallow? Perhaps. Ethnocentric? Welcome to the human race.

My brother lost two sons in a car accident 9 years ago yesterday. The grief was horrible. I still nine years later feel grief and emotion about that loss. I do not have the same level of emotional grief about other young men lost in hundreds of car accidents across the globe since that time, but I still grieve my nephews. Does that make me hypocritical? Insensitive? Do I not value all life? There is a difference in the intrinsic value of life that all have as children of God and the relational value someone has to me because of our closeness. Grieving more for my nephews does not imply that I think other life does not have equal value, but just that I am more impacted by their loss.

I think the same is going on with Paris for many (not all) in the USA. Many of us have been there. France is our nation’s oldest ally. To many (not all) of us, Paris itself represents love and romance, beauty and western culture. So the image of shooters killing young people in cafes in Paris not surprisingly will have a greater emotional impact on many (not all) than a similar event happening elsewhere. That says nothing about the intrinsic value of life or the intrinsic level of evil – it simply says the connection is stronger for many of us, thus the impact feels greater. I would anticipate most Kenyans grieved much more intensely and had much more news coverage over the horrible massacre at Garissa University than they did over the bombing in Bangkok.

So my suggestion – let people grieve and process as they need. There is ample time later for us to discuss the global challenges and, yes, our media’s tendency to imply varying degrees of value to life based on country of origin or ethnicity. For now, let’s stand with people in their grief – not scold them for grieving incorrectly.

Now to fear – yes, this is scary stuff. But even if an attack like this happened weekly in our country, it would still not match the number of deaths to car accidents. Yet we all still drive and don’t write excoriating posts about the stupidity of getting behind the wheel of our cars. I’m not proposing we don’t try to prevent attacks. I’m just saying we don’t always apply cold logic to risk, but respond more in fear and emotion. People often ask about risk to our missionaries and I remind that the number one cause of death among missionaries is car accidents! But we still allow them to ride in cars.

I have seen several governors, including my own in Georgia, stating that they do not want any Syrian refugees in their states. Oh, my Facebook wall is full of posts praising these bold actions as well as snarky posts saying it is stupid. Yes, the fear is real. Yes, one of the terrorists in Paris did come with refugees. So I understand the reaction and the sentiment and will not call any one coming to that conclusion stupid and will avoid snarky reactions.

That said, I ask you to consider that these refugees are fleeing from the same systems that produced the violence in Paris, Lebanon, Libya, Nigeria, and other places. They didn’t leave by choice. Should tens of thousands of refugees be punished because of the actions of a handful? Are the famous words on the Statue of Liberty now to be amended so that “huddled masses” are no longer welcome because they might have a bad guy among them? Perhaps we should take a big, deep collective breath and consider how we can reduce the risk of the bad guys while at the same time offering hospitality to the thousands who are dispossessed and have lost everything. If we meet them with hostility, all we do is give breeding ground for more marginalization and despair, which is fodder for the bad guys. Further, we might lose our own soul in the process. If, like me, you are a follower of Christ, then our marching orders on such matters are pretty explicit – welcome the stranger and protect the alien. Hard to get around that one!

Finally, another area of fear. Muslims in general. I’ll try to keep this brief although I could write pages about this, but there are articles that do better if people will simply take the time to read them. There are bad Muslims and they do use elements of the Islamic religion to justify horrendous actions. No question. And they are very scary. But they are a very, very small minority of the 1.6 billion Muslims worldwide. All the main streams of Islam and their scholars have denounced ISIS and Al-Qaida. All. They just don’t get much press since it doesn’t fit with the oversimplified narrative. There are many, many, many more Muslims dying at the hands of the extremists than Christians or westerners.

We lived in a predominantly Muslim country for ten years. We were embraced, offered hospitality and friendship. This is a very common experience for foreigners among Muslims except in those few places where extremists hold sway. It saddens me to know that Muslims who have suffered often at the hands of other Muslims, lost everything, spent years in refugee camps, and finally realize a dream of a new life in the USA are met with hostility and suspicion. And the irony is that it is hostility and suspicion that can lead to marginalization and vulnerability to becoming radicalized. That’s what the Paris attack planners hoped to create – more recruits.

This is not naivety – I know there are bad extremists who want to send people to kill. And they will do that until they are defeated. But I firmly believe they will be defeated much quicker if we can build bridges to the many millions of Muslims who just want to raise their families and live a peaceful life. If we think bombs are the solution, I’m afraid we are misguided – every bomb creates space for more extremists. The battle has to be fought equally fervently for the hearts and minds of these populations – and we have allies here among our Muslim countrymen and women if we will but reach out and build relationships.

Jesus said that perfect love casts out fear. And we know we are commanded to love everyone – neighbor and enemy. So if we are fearing our Muslim neighbors, that means we are not loving them and are thus disobeying another pretty direct command of our Lord.

Lots of stuff here – I don’t purport to have all the answers nor could I put it all down in two pages if I did. Only politicians can do that! But I do invite all to process thoughtfully, prayerfully, and reflectively. For believers in Jesus, what do His words and actions tell us? What do other words from the Bible speak in this context? Maybe invite a Muslim neighbor or coworker for coffee and listen to his or her story, what are his fears, what are her aspirations? You might find this exercise will help you process Paris, refugees. It might lessen your fear and help restore hope in humanity. And you might even discover a friend.